What an exhausting weekend this was. The only way I can justify to myself that it was okay to slip away again is because of two reasons: 1. I slipped away into myself but its not like I slipped away from the world. I continued to work, take care of the house, watched a movie, enjoyed time with the family, appreciated Mr. Hubby (a little late, but still, better late than never), and 2. A post written by Janice: http://keepingupwithangels.blogspot.com/2009/05/for-little-cubs-mama.html
The funny thing is, I only now noted what the title of this post is and I think it hit me now that Janice actually wrote this for me...I'm in shock and could burst into tears. I wanted to do that all weekend - just sit down and cry. I didn't because I felt like once I started I would never stop. The reason? That missing empty gap...the something is missing feeling...was so over powering...I just couldn't help from slipping deep into myself.
I think I'm out of it now...or maybe I'm not. Not quite sure yet. But either way I know that its ok to be where I am. The day I start pulling away from the world is the day I worry myself. But for now, I think I'm 'allowed' to slip into myself. Just because I feel like it.
Maybe today I'll go home, turn on the AC (its SO HOT in Karachi!) and make my 3000 piece puzzle. Usually that will calm down the frazzled nerves in my brain.
HMMMMM....that sounds like a plan :)
Fulfilled
7 years ago
I used to get that feeling all the time. It was more prominent in my early days. It has since subsided. I want to apologize for misspelling Azlan's name. I do know how important that is. I have corrected it. Thank you for your kind words.
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